Philadelphia - 2 years later

I came to Pennsylvania 2 years ago as a wide eyed college freshman hoping to explore the excitement of the East Coast. An English major with a passion for reading and writing, Vice President of her class, Dance Team, Sorority girl - nothing could stop me. I was so naive.

Somehow I let it all go wrong. I let someone take control and watched them destroy me. What happened was no one's fault except my own. I let it happen. I let my life slip out of my hands. At the end I crawled out black and blue -alone. To pick up the pieces of my broken life and heart by myself. No friends left to help me.

And now here I am. Sitting at a computer in a Philadelphia row home. Do I regret what happened? No, because to regret all the pain and suffering would not make me who I am today. I learned a lot. About people and most of all about myself. I am stronger, more mature, centered, but still terribly naive. I can certainly say that I value myself more than ever and I am only too careful when choosing friends.

There has been a cold sterile, desperate devouring, and not the warm, full flowing over in loving laughter which is now. This is all still too new. To be comfortable, not scared, loving someone without constant fear. The beaten black and blue soul of this girl being nourished by love. Satisfying without quite fulfilling.

Hopefully, this blog will become an outlet for me.

All while remembering to keep my dreams.