Cat Calls On My Way To Class

I can't lie. Everywhere I go men let out little cat calls in my direction. At times I can't help, but love that guys drool over me. But on days like today it just gets really fucking old.

I was awakened at 5:45am by Billy's icy feet slipping into bed with me. After that I couldn't sleep and I didn't drag myself out of bed until the alarm sounded at 8:15. I managed coherence for about 30 minutes before doing any productive activity. I grabbed the first resemblance of an outfit I could find and dashed downstairs. I scrambled about for the car keys and my purse and rushed out of the house.

The second I stepped out of the car it started.

The Valet Guy:

"Oh damn girl, look at those legs."

(He always says something nice to me everyday so I don't mind too much.)

Guy In Food Cart:

"Ooh Mami, How boutcha come over here and I make ya somtin reeel nice."

"No, thanks I don't eat food from carts and I certainly don't date them either."

My walk to school was filled with offers for molestation and cock suckin. I was becoming very irritable. I knew I was going to flip out if anyone said anything else to me.

"Newports. Foh' Dollaz." And he waved a pack right in my face.

"I don't want any fucking cigarettes. Get the fuck out of my face before I rip off your testicles."

Can't these people just leave me alone.

Just when I thought I couldn't become any more irrate. I heard a whistle.

"Damnnn baby girl. You're hot baby. Real hot. baby! Cah'mere! Howa bout' you an' me get togetha. Make some saweet love."

I turn and stare at him right in his beady little eyes. Everyone within a 5 mile radius heard me scream at him.

"Ok darlin'. Let's go. Right here. Come on. I am waiting! Get it out!"

Long Pause.

He chuckled to himself.

"Have a good afternoon baby."

I turned away and a grin spread across my face and I knew.

I won.

Sometimes I don't mind the hissing it's a nice confirmation of my ravishing appearance. But some days you're better off just keeping your mouth shut.